Thursday, April 12, 2012

Unfocused Blogging and Stunt Idiots

It's time for another random act of blogging. Hey... at least I am trying to reach out.... to make the connection... to impress you with my scattered, noncommittal ways. Because nothing is more impressive than being scattered and noncommittal. It's a form of self sabotage really. If I get my act together then I have to try to keep it together and honestly the thought of it is more than I can bear. So. The topic of todays blog is this.... Stuff We Did Lately. This has also been the topic of almost all the posts from the past two months. There you see, is the level of consistency I offer you as a reader. You can always count on me to tell you about some stuff. Stuff that happened lately. And when you get right down to it that is the essence of what a blog should be, right? Sure. Let's go with it!

Where to begin? Let's start with Rudy. Lately he has been fussy. He barks at people in the yard, even people that he knows. He leaves mouthfuls of dog food all around the house on the floor. He makes calls to Bermuda on my cell phone and then tries to blame it on Rochester the neighbor dog.  Here is a picture of Rochester.....

And here is a picture of Rudy. I will leave it up to you to decide who looks more guilty.

Here is a picture of Rudy attacking Billy in bed at night. I think you can clearly see by the look on Rudy's face that his intent is to be a menace for pure sport. He is sinister and thinks it's funny.

That's really all I have for you about little dogs at this time. Little dogs think that the whole world should be a party just for them all the time and Rudy is their ring leader.

So I have talked about bootcamp here... it's the exercise class that we go to three times a week. We are still going and it is still kicking our asses. We have two weeks left in this 8 week session, then we get a week off before the next one begins. The good people who run the camp are having a photo contest where you can win 30% off the cost of your next session. The only rule for the contest is that you are wearing your bootcamp t shirt in the snapshot. Billy and I set out a few days ago to take our winning photographs. I really can't stand the idea of anything less than 1st place. They are giving 2nd and third place prizes of 20 and 10 percent off but those amounts are for someone else who is not willing to look like a complete idiot in their photo.

We decided to hike up to the top of Atalaya mountain which is right up behind our neighborhood. It's about 9,100 feet in elevation so it gives an awesome view of the city and the surrounding landscape clear to Albuquerque. I wanted the epic view behind us for our series of pictures we had in mind.

Let's start off with some super idiotic looking shots of me doing a side plank (sort of) on some boulders on the edge of a cliff! Normally side plank would be done on the floor and from your elbow not up on your hand like how I am here.... but sometimes you have to make modifications when trying not to fall off the precipice and die.  I think these two pictures scream out "TA DAAHHH!" Don't you?

Next we have Billy jumping. Jumping can look very dramatic at 9, 000 feet, no? You may wish that Billy was wearing a parachute or that he had wings here.... but it's all an illusion. He only hurt himself mildly upon landing.

And again with the side plank. Man, are we happy or what? Try to imagine what other hikers passing by must have thought of us if they caught a glimpse of our activity. Also... try to imagine me getting in to this position within the ten second time frame the camera gave me before firing off.

This is a favorite. I can almost bet that you have not seen this before. Or at least not lately. This is Big Bill McLane's fancy stunt version of a head stand. Whaaat?! And again.... done near the edge of a cliff for dramatic effect. People... do not try this at home.

Finally.... Billy posing as a tree limb. Anther amazing feat not many people are probably prone to even try to do.

What do you think? Is the winning shot in there? 30% off worthy stuff? I hope so. We had a few risky moments involved in getting these pics. For example this one....

At first glance it may look like I am running through the scene like a champ. But NO! On closer inspection (see the bottom foot) I am falling sideways off the boulder into an area of smaller rocks and a drop off a few feet beyond. Why did this happen? Because I was trying to do this pose....

What does this pose even mean? It seemed like a good idea at the time. Really though... it's more of an ice skating maneuver don't you think? Yes. And then I fell sideways (it was Billy's fault... he told me to twist my upper body toward the camera more so he could see the shirt better) and nearly died. Somehow while falling, as my life flashed before my eyes I managed to twist in mid air and ended up sticking the landing with both feet and came out unscathed. Bootcamp. It can transform even the biggest idiot in to a strong, balanced and capable idiot.

OK! That's all I have. I hope it was enough. I will report back on the outcome of the photo contest. Cross your fingers for us that nobody has images of themselves lifting a baby hippo over their head while riding a unicycle in their bootcamp gear or something. Have a great weekend y'all.


Caitlin said...

Damn, I can't see how anyone could beat you with those photos! Those are bananas! Sorry Rudy has been a pain lately, I know that facial expression because Cypress has it a lot :)

Tracey said...

I vote for the first side plank/tadah!, or Billy on his head.
BTW you make me laugh out loud, and that is impressive. Cheers for that, and good luck with the comp.

Gordon Nicholds said...

Great post! Someday, I swear, I'm gonna blog. You set the bar damned high though...

Anonymous said...

Story about global warming again on the news.
The gods have the freedom to rapidly accelerate global warming because of unregulated Chinese industrialization. And they are using it.
Whereas US industrial regulation combined with automotive smog devices had contained emmissions, the shameful emmissions at the hand of the Italians which allocated the financing of chinese growth will ultimately kill our planet
The gods must abjectly hate the Italians:::They ruined our cultures, eliminating Old Worlds around the globe, they destroyed our societies and now they will be used to ruin the planet.
Intelligent design:::Everything the gods do has purpose. There was purpose in the Italian boot, the Scandanavian penis, the sheep of Europe and the SFBA Beast. Chinese/Asian slanted eyes is yet another. Designed to make them/some look evil, they are a warning to other races. What is occurring with enviornmental degredation is living proof and may be the reason why they have this appearance.
Never forget the shameful experience we each had in 2008 when the Chinese desperately tried to clean up the envionment in Beijing.

Recall the $5 trillion Republican scam where W set up the evil Democrats to sign the credit card receipt.
Expect some portion of the $5 trillion stolen from the United States creatively went to the Catholic Church, positioned to bitterly complain they lost their affluent white parishoners for poor Latinos and the US is all their doing anyways.
I always suspected there has been a skim on the US General Fund (1/3) all along. And the gods are using these clone host fakes to kill Planet Earth::::The puppeteer pulling the strings, ironically.

Jesus is a false god.
There is no Satan. The world around us is all the god's doing:::You have to be tested with temptation.
Christianity is a test.
Muslim misery? The gods claim they are trying to "help you". The gods control everything, choreograph all that we see, including Isreal's relationship with Palestine, an "obligation" for their money-grubbing acceptance of the Evil Empire's billions. They also control the Italians, victims of the Moorish invasion/rape of their women, positioned in charge of this false reality through Christianity.
The gods created all this to position this reality you experience today.
"Earning" is temptation. It is a lie leading people into Damnation. Any hope of the Muslim world regaining the power they once had is long since over and it will never, ever return. Their acts 0f terrorism are only hurting them in the eyes of the gods.
The gods claim they are trying to "help you", but they also stoked your pride with your regional superpower status of centuries ago, rendering their efforts today merely destructive, a very bad sign. This means the gods have major problems with your people.
Never forget:::The gods work in mysterious ways. A mortal trying to understand may envoke their wrath. You shouldn't need to.

I believe the gods relocated the Jews to another planet before the Holocaust began to give them additional time before Earth fell into the social decay Christianity and the United States is responsible for. I suspect this favor included some/many of the Native America peoples as well.
Unfortunately for Muslims you didn't have the favor necessary to be allowed such generosity. I believe it is due to your mysogyny, your belief women are inferior to the men. This does not include veiling, which is a positive for the people and helps maintain decency within your society.
Orthodoxy is always the best course of action because, as I have repeated, old is mostly good and a little evil, while new is mostly evil and a little good. This applies to Islam as well.